New Year, New Priorities
2018 has been the busiest year of my life.
In January I signed with my superstar agent, Kathleen Rushall, in May I switched to the UberEats team at work, in June I sold EMMY IN THE KEY OF CODE (HMH/Versify September 24, 2019), and in October I got married. Throughout the year I published over a dozen crossword puzzles, I began the research on a new book project that I finished drafting during NaNoWriMo, I expanded my freelance editorial/writing/speaking business, and just last week I hit my goal of reading fifty books before the new year.
It’s been
nuts.
And I don’t want to complain! I’ve been working toward so much of this for the better part of a decade, and I’ve been dreaming about it for far longer. And I’m so excited about what’s to come that I’m actually looking forward to the end of the holidays so I can get back to work!
But also this year has pushed me to my breaking point.
I’ve always been a “say yes to everything” kind of person. Commit to it now, and figure out a way to make it work later. And that’s been a successful strategy for me thus far, but as my authorial career begins, I can’t pretend that this is the best strategy for me moving forward.
There was a point in 2018 when I was trying to hit a deadline for an Uber project, while also turning around a revision of EMMY, all in the final weeks before my wedding. I was pulling 18 hour days, 7 days a week, for about two months, and by the time my wedding rolled around, it felt like a vacation.
I can’t do that again this year.
Well…
I *could* do that again this year.
I could spend 2019 the same way I spent 2018.
I could go another year without taking a day off.
I could keep waking up at 5 AM because I’m too anxious to sleep through to my alarm.
I could continue juggling four different high-priority projects at any given time.
And I could spend another year canceling on friends because I didn’t realize how overwhelmed I’d be with work.
I could do all this
but I’m not going to.
In October of 2018 I made the decision to go part-time at Uber.
Starting in January, I will be working only three days a week, leaving me with two extra days a week to write, research, travel, and rest.
On the one hand, this seems like an obvious win: I’m lucky that I can afford to make this switch, and I’m lucky that Uber is supporting me in this decision. Plus, I’m optimistic that it will give me the balance that I need to remain energized on all projects I choose to take on.
But on the other hand, this is kind of terrifying: I’m the first engineer at Uber to take on a part-time schedule, so this is a huge experiment for everyone involved. Plus, not only am I taking a 40% pay cut, but I’m going to miss out on high-visibility projects, and it’s going to be nearly impossible for me to ever get promoted again, much less become a manager, which is something that I’ve always thought I wanted out of my tech career.
I also have no idea how long-term this plan is.
There’s a chance that this is the ideal balance for me, but there’s also a chance that I want more days a week to write, and I end up leaving tech entirely.
It could also swing the other way, and I may realize that two days a week of writing is too much, and that I miss the social interaction of an office environment.
And what happens if EMMY is a total bust and what if I can never sell another book again and what if it turns out that the very fact that I was stressed all the time is what made me a productive writer?? And what if and what if and what if and what if…
I have no idea what’s going to happen
but I do know that I’m so excited for 2019.
I’m excited for the world to meet Emmy.
I’m excited to take Sundays as a rest day.
I’m excited to write my new project.
I’m excited for all the travel I have planned in the new year.
I’m excited to sometimes spend those extra two days binge-watching Netflix.
And I’m excited to look back at this post one year from today and think about how I had absolutely no idea what was in store for me in 2019.
Happy new year everybody!